beneath human relationships

starting the reflection

You know how sometimes you get those surprising insights about yourself? Well, that happened to me recently when I took a personality test at work. I scored really high in empathy and emotional intelligence, but very low in relationship building. It was a bit of a surprise since I’m very outgoing (the kind of person who greets everyone I meet, whether I know them or not) and I genuinely enjoy connecting with people. But it made me realize that while I’m comfortable with emotional connections, I’m also pretty strategic about how I engage with them.

This new self-insight made me contemplate on the complexity of human interaction, how we communicate, connect, and even hold back. And I’m probably not alone in this. For many professionals, the demands of work and life often push us to prioritise what we subconsciously perceive as crucial: work, close family, or significant others. This brings up an important question: as professionals, how can we improve the way we nurture relationships without feeling overwhelmed? Here are a few thoughts:

.reducing noise, optimise clarity.

Communication is at the core of any relationship, yet it’s not as simple as just exchanging words. What we say (and even what is unsaid) is often not received as intended. Similarly, our understanding of someone else’s words or actions isn’t always accurate either. The words, tone, and gestures we use carry meaning, but that meaning is reshaped by the listener’s emotions, experiences, and assumption. This is what we called “noise”, which might distort the message’s original meaning. The depth of this noise significantly affects the quality of the message received.

To communicate more effectively, minimizing noise from our end is crucial. This involves choosing clearer words, maintaining a calm tone, being mindful of timing, actively listening, and interpreting with empathy. Miscommunication is a two-way street, mutual and endlessly dynamic. Mastering communication can transform the quality of our relationships, both personal and professional.

.the human’s dynamic nature.

Even after decades together, people still surprise us. It makes me wonder: How many layers does a person’s personality truly have? The complexity of human nature ensures that we may never fully “know” someone, not even ourselves.

Understanding human personality feels like peeling an onion, there are layers beneath what we see to uncover. Humans are incredibly dynamics, constantly shaped by experiences, environments, and even contradictions. For example, someone might adapt their behavior to fit their surroundings but behave in a completely opposite way to reject what they dislike.

Awareness of this constant evolution also requires the willingness to tolerate and adapt to the change, even when it feels inconvenient. Accepting this dynamism not only improves our relationships but also allows room for personal growth (fostering empathy and greater understanding toward others.

.balancing professional and personal connections.

In a professional setting, we often prioritize efficiency over emotional investment. It’s easy to focus only on “necessary” relationships, that are tied directly to our tasks or goals. But what if improving these “non-essential” relationships could actually boost our work performance and well-being? A simple smile, a thoughtful gesture, or a few extra moments to check in with a colleague can make a big difference. It’s about finding small, manageable ways to connect meaningfully without feeling overwhelmed.

Take a moment to consider your own network. Are there relationships you’ve been neglecting? How could investing a little more time and energy in those connections enhance your work and personal life?

concluding thought

Despite the challenges, human interaction is vital to personal growth. Every conversation is an opportunity to learn about many things, even about ourselves. The key is to approach relationships with curiosity and enthusiasm rather than obligation. Ask yourself: How can I better understand this person? What value can I bring to this interaction? By shifting our perspective, we can turn even the most complex relationships into opportunities for learning and connection.